* fragments of the same dead star



a girl who doesnt live life the way she wants it to be, peppering her existence with countless regrets along the lifelong journey



EARCANDY

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redox is a stupid ox

i spent my public holiday studying. how very entertaining :) not really. :/

well but it wasn't that bad. went to the starbucks at mpcc with my sister and i met tiffany there. half studying half talking with alvina. her school is more slack compared to CJ la.. she's like enjoying her weekend. studied for like 8 hours.. the longest time i've ever taken to study ever! and the starbucks guy working there was from CJ too and he gave us like water to drink hahah maybe he's biased towards CJ pple or something. oh yeah his name is dom.. short for dominic. tiff and i realised the 2 girls sitting somewhere near us were from CJ too.. mannn this is CJ invasion!

reminiscence and uncertainty

real glad i managed to get your number and wish you a happy birthday! altho i still hadn't got a phone by then and i had to use my mum's handphone.. (but i have a hp now!) but still.. i kinda sense that you don't really wanna talk to me.. you're only doing so out of politeness. not becos you want to. well.. i know i may be insignificant in your life.. but you know.. you mean a lot to me.. goodness knows why.. i don't know why either. i missed you dearly after you left....... now i only think about you occasionally. well i miss your hugs, your small friendly gestures..and you've definitely played a part in helping me to grow spiritually.. i remember the first time we met you even bought me this necklace at the store. dear girl, i still wanna keep a friendship with you. i don't think you know this.. but why should you anyway. you have your own life to lead.. your own friends.. i'm just part of the past.. a kinda short past at that. don't get freaked out or anything.. i'm not like in love with you or something.. but it's a friendship kinda love. i'm afraid that one day i'll forget you.. considering that we've known each other for only about a year? i'm not sure. but the thing is.. have you forgotten me?

anyway enuff of all that soppy thoughts. i've never realised how much i missed dance until joining the cjc dance cca. heck.. i even wanna go back to school on a public holiday becos that's the day when we're supposed to have dance! (sigh what's wrong with me) the last time i danced was during april's emdd. [i do miss being a kcian] i've almost forgotten how dance gives you that 'high'.. that feel good feeling. groove to the beat.. don't stop moving.. even when the music's over.. keep it up.. body mind soul.. and i'm practising for SYF now! first practice today.. and the choreography is pretty cool although it's contemporary (something i never really had much interest in) needs lotsa control.. all the accents.. and oh gawd how my knees hurt! okay well my back kinda hurts too.. and the ankles.. and my leg muscles.. okay basically i hurt hahah. but still.. cjc dance is different from kc dance.. like what mel said.. cjc dancers can do more if they just simply push themselves harder. i wanna take part in SYF! but...... do i wanna stay in cj? not really... so how! i don't wanna back out of the SYF practices.. but i know i have to sometime soon. just when i was starting to enjoy dance again.. i gotta pull out. so do i stay in cj? but i can't stay just cos of dance right.. that's silly. but then again.. being in the school day in day out.. i've gotten used to it. do i rilly wanna leave this environment? i dunno.. me and my inability to adapt to changes. if i do leave.. i'd definitely miss this place

reminiscence and uncertainty

got me thinking..

am i an introvert or an extrovert?

anyway will i make it in time to wish you happy birthday? if so.. i need to get a handphone by tmr! after all these years.. i still remember..